Am I pro-life?

Many people might want to throw their computers out the window after they read what I am about to write. Keep reading anyway.

Here it goes....

Being pro-life is not everything.

Are you still there?

Let me elaborate...

There is a difference between being anti-death and being pro-life. One can oppose death and at the same time not actively support life.

Understand where I'm at?

A couple of months ago, I sat across from a young girl, holding her hands and welcoming her tears. Let me tell you her story. "Lashawna" is homeless. She sleeps on friends' couches and takes a meal where she can get it. She has no contact with her family...if you can even call "them" that. Her father abandoned the family when Lashawna was a baby. Lashawna's mother was physically abusive to all 3 of her kids, but especially to Lashawna's younger sister, who has some special needs. Lashawna and her sisters were removed from the home and passed from foster home to foster home until, at 18, Lashawna aged out of the system...which pretty much brings us full circle. Homeless. Familyless. Hopeless. And now pregnant. Lashawna came to me considering abortion.

It is easy to check a box on a ballot. It's easy to spout off an easily defined conviction at a cocktail party. But what do you say to Lashawna?

Homeless. Familyless. Hopeless.

I can tell her not to abort her baby.
I cannot guarantee she will have help raising her baby.
I cannot guarantee she will have a place to live.
I cannot promise that she will have the resources to buy prenatal vitamins and diapers.
I cannot promise that her child "won't end up like me...being passed from home to home" if she chooses adoption.
I can tell her not to abort her baby. But I can't promise her any of those other things, because there are plenty of statistics to sabotage those promises. Unless I choose to be actively pro-life for her and her child, they will end up being just another one of those statistics (and there are plenty not-so-good-ones to choose from).
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Recently, I stumbled across THIS ARTICLE. Oh my. It is pretty much my heart, summed up on a page.

Friends, we are so eager to shout to the world that we are "PRO-LIFE!" But are we truly pro-life, or just anti-death?

I am terrified to admit it, but I must say that my answer to Kinsey Thurlow's question would have to be "no." There are hundreds of thousands of kids waiting to be adopted here in the US. Millions more around the world. If we, the people of God, are not even caring for these kids, why would we be arrogant enough to think we could take on thousands more? ***I am by NO MEANS saying that abortion is right, good, or any of the like. (And I'm also not saying that GOD could not handle the thousands of lives that are in jeopardy here)***

I'm just giving you something to think about at your next cocktail party...Abortion creates brokenness. However, the faces behind abortion are complicated. They are hurting. They are also uniquely beautiful. And they need us to be pro-LIFE for THEM, too...not just for their babies.

I've heard a couple of people respond to Thurlow's article by saying that God's people have not been educated about foster care and adoption, that what we need to do is focus on educating people about the need.

As a full-time student (who has been a student pretty much since she was born), I'm here to educate YOU about...well, education.

learning [lur-ning]:
--noun
1. by systematic study in any field of scholarly application.

2. the act or process of acquiring knowledge or skill.
3. the modification of behavior through practice, training, or experience.

Let me just say this. It is the job of my professors to present information. As a nursing student, it is my job to show up to class, study the reading material, review what is presented, and apply, both to my life and to my nursing practice, the information I am receiving. My professors do not bang on my door each morning, make sure I am up and reading my textbooks, lead me to class, or watch me review. These things are not in their job description.

I'm sure there is truth to the statement: "The Church has not been educated about foster care and adoption." I'm also sure that God longs for His people to actively pursue His heart...to actively pray that He would burden them with the things that burden His heart. I'm sure that He longs for His people to study His Word, to intentionally look for ways to carry out His work here on earth.

So here is my plea. Don't let ignorance be the barrier between you and God's heart. Don't wait for someone to spoon-feed you. Take it upon yourself to learn His likes and dislikes, His passions and burdens. PRAY that God would reveal to you ways you can be not only anti-death, but also PRO-LIFE. STUDY God's Word...I'm pretty sure you'll see God's heart for the oppressed shine through. REVIEW how God might have you act. {And don't think, by any means, that I am not including myself in this plea...I am, as you read this, taking a dose of my own medicine.}

Let's give people like Lashawna a reason to believe they do not have to resign themselves to the statistics. Let's come alongside them and give them a home, a family, and a hope in the God who loves them more than they could even fathom. I may not be able to promise many things, but I can guarantee that our God is not only against death, but also very much for LIFE. And He longs to raise LIFE out of death...through the hands and feet and servant hearts of His people.

Rest...and a deep conviction

So much to say...so much on my mind. I'm enjoying the forced stillness required by an airport layover. Take a guess where I've been : )

Quiet Waters Park...so beautiful!

After a long, busy couple of weeks (with some hard days thrown in there) I was given the gift of a sabbath-rest kind of trip to Annapolis, MD, where a dear friend currently resides.
Do you ever just LONG for a renewed spirit, for the kind of rest that allows your heart to breath deeply and sigh in exclamation? I'm learning how important it is to answer that call. After all, God commanded us to rest...perhaps he knew we would need the command in a culture that lures us into the vortex of busyness. And while I didn't need to fly across the country to find rest, I was privileged to be able to do just that!

As I sipped coffee while also soaking in the breeze off the water, I was overwhelmed by God's gracious provision of soul-deep rest.

The view I enjoyed on my morning walks

I'm convinced sunsets are a love-kiss from the Creator himself! And I'm partial to sunsets over the water!
Can you guess where my friend recently graduated from?

If you guessed the US Naval Academy, you would be correct = ) She had to work the football game, so I got to take in all the festivities from the stands.

Other trip highlights included a DC day trip, dinner at a local hole-in-the-wall situated on the water (incredible crab cakes!), times of prayer together for dear friends facing various trials, a morning of thanksgiving and reflection remembering God's faithfulness to both of us throughout the past year, lots of walks enjoying beautiful fall weather, and a soak in a bubbly jacuzzi. I know, I am incredibly blessed!

As I spent some time reflecting on the abundance of things I had to be thankful for this year (while also listening to the lapping of waves), I was overwhelmed with a deep gratitude for the perspective God has given me in the past year. Perspective is not always fun, and it can be incredibly lonely, but it is always good...especially when it is God's perspective. I'm not sure I can accurately express what I mean, but please hang with me as I try to convey what has been weighing on my heart. Two years ago, I was faced with the brokenness of this world in a totally new way...a way I would have preferred not to meet. Through my dad's illness and death, my eyes were opened to a whole new world. It was like I had been seeing the stage before, only now the curtain had been whipped aside and I was seeing the mess of backstage in bright light as well. Many people don't understand my new perspective. Some people understand all too well. While I don't always appreciate the new lens through which I see the world, it has forever changed my life and the way I face each day.

Yesterday, my friend and I visited the Holocaust museum in Washington, D.C...a very powerful experience, to say the least. Unfortunately, the use of cameras is prohibited, or I would have taken pictures to share with you.

First they came for the Socialists, and I did not speak out --
Because I was not a Socialist.

Then they came for the Trade Unionists, and I did not speak out --
Because I was not a Trade Unionist.

Then they came for the Jews, and I did not speak out --
Because I was not a Jew.

Then they came for me -- and there was no one left to speak for me.

~Martin Niemoller (engraved on wall of Holocaust museum)

I was deeply, deeply disturbed by what I saw, but the thing that saddened me the most really had little to do with the past. As I walked by gruesome image after gruesome image, and read about how very few people were actually brave enough to stand up to the horrors they knew were going on WHILE they were going on, I was gripped with the reality that the same thing is happening today. We mourn the abomination of the Holocaust and condemn the people who caused so much death and tribulation, and rightly we should. And yet today, there are millions of people starving to death, simply because they live THERE and we live here. There are more young girls than we can even count being used as sex slaves, girls who long ago gave up hope of rescue. There are children being orphaned every day because their parents did not have access to drugs we hand out like candy here. There are thousands upon thousands of people who will die tomorrow, simply because they had no access to clean drinking water. And on and on and on. The truly sickening reality is this: When faced with such horrors, IF we are faced with them, we turn away. We click the red X, we punch the POWER button, we close our eyes. Just like they did.

The question that haunts me is this:

WHAT WILL IT TAKE?

What will it take for people to wake up? To stand up and take action? As God's people, we should be in the front lines of those seeking to bring justice to this world. With the new perspective God has given me, I am very well aware that the world will be a broken place until Christ Himself makes it new. However, we are called to be His image bearers, to be a light to a dark world. To seek justice, to stand up for the oppressed. To play a part in bringing restoration and healing to the brokenness. We are sleeping, though.

There were many times in that Holocaust tour that I was sorely tempted to close my eyes. The images were piercing and will forever be imprinted on my heart. As I am faced with current needs, with the many desperations that scar the world today, there are also times I want to close my eyes, to ignore brokenness that overwhelms a world I want to pretend is perfect. God calls us to live with open eyes, though. To ignore the urge to shout "lalalalala" when we get uncomfortable. To reach past our own relatively easy lives, to educate ourselves and our children about the needs in the world. To stand up for the broken.

I could easily get overwhelmed. There is so much brokenness, too much hurt for me to even comprehend. But God doesn't call us to be saviors...He calls us to be open to His work, to seek out His work and join Him in it. Brokenness is not a thing of the past, or a thing on the other side of the world...Brokenness is on your doorstep, in your churches, throughout your workplaces. Brokenness is everywhere, in many different guises. Will you close your eyes to it, shout "lalalala," and continue to live in the plush comfort of your own little world? Or will you be one of the few to stand up, to raise your hands in surrender and say, "I'LL go...USE me, God, to play a part in bringing your kingdom here on earth"? The choice is ours to make.

"Don't excuse yourself by saying, 'Look, we didn't know.' For God understands all hearts, and he sees you. He who guards your soul knows you knew. He will repay all people as their actions deserve" (Proverbs 24:12).

I'll leave you with one more picture from my trip...while I could go on (I'm in a chatty mood, I know...), I am entering a Thanksgiving technology fast.

So farewell Maryland (I really enjoyed everything you had to offer!), farewell all, and Happy Thanksgiving!

God's Conviction in a Little Boy

There is nothing like sickness to make me feel sorry for myself. I have had what started as a cold for almost 3 weeks now, and to be honest, I am just tired of it. I'm tired of tissues and snot and a hacking cough and just plain feeling crummy. I'm tired of being tired. And I've complained about it--in my head, but I've complained nonetheless.

This morning I was sitting in Panera, reading my Bible and sipping on some coffee, when I noticed a little boy across the room start to vomit. His mom gently held his head into a potato chip bag and softly soothed, loud enough for me to hear, "It's okay buddy, it's okay." I looked around and saw that no one was jumping up to help this woman and her sick little guy, so I moved to get some napkins and hand them to her as she started to clean up the mess. As she wiped up the vomit, I went back to what I was doing. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed that the little boy went back to his lunch and his mom sat down next to him like nothing had happened. In my head, I started to judge her: "THIS is why we have a stomach flu epidemic! Moms like HER don't have enough polite regard for the public--aka, ME--to take this sick boy home instead of sitting with him in a public place to expose everyone to his germs!"

I have noticed that God uses the most simple, mundane moments to convict us of our most "simple, mundane" sins. As I moved to leave, I felt a hand on my shoulder and, as I turned around, I was greeted by the face of the woman I had been quietly judging. "Thanks again for the napkins," she said. Then she spoke the three words God used to convict my heart of too-quick judgments and a complaining and ungrateful attitude: "He has cancer."

I was shocked. After all, he didn't look like he had cancer. As I got in my car and drove away, conviction overwhelmed my heart and tears oozed from my eyes. While I have a nasty cold that has made life very uncomfortable, this little boy has a disease that is threatening even his ability to eat a little lunch. While I will "suffer" through my minor illness for maybe a few weeks, this little boy may not even live to "suffer" through such an annoyance. And before I even begin to pat myself on the back for merely laying some napkins on the table for this little guy, I stop to consider the great sacrifices made by his mother. She has chosen to allow her boy to live life to the fullest, undeterred by the judging stares flashed her way by strangers like me.

Today, won't you consider with me the abundance of blessings that scatter our paths? Once we see the beauty of all God has blessed us with, maybe we will have more compassion in our hearts and vigilance with our eyes to notice the hurt that also litters our path. Oh Lord, give me eyes to see past the obvious, to notice the immense hurt around me.