Restless

Do you ever just feel restless? As I grow to know Jesus more and more each day, I better understand this restlessness in me. It used to be a squirming, an uncomfortable longing for something I couldn't even name. It turned into a desire for the beauty, peace, and comfort that always seemed just out of reach. It became a longing for the perfection of a day in heaven, sitting next to my dad and feeling fully satisfied.

I am still restless. I am still "running hard for the other side, the world I've always been denied." There are days when I drive down the road, burdened by emotions and feelings I can't even sort out or explain. I am still trying desperately to find His face in everything, in the mundane, in the joys and aches of everyday living.

Lately, I find this song resounding with my heart. I understand now that, through this restlessness, I am looking for Him...trying to make sense out of this crazy world and the crazy world that is inside of me. On the days when I feel scrambled inside--restless--I pray that He draws me closer to Himself. I pray that, through the incompleteness (or pain, brokenness, heartache...you fill in the blank) of this life, I am reminded of the greater story He is writing, a story that will one day answer this restlessness with everlasting PEACE. Until then, I will always be looking for Him...in the tears, in the monotonous tasks of daily living, in the moments of sipping coffee with dear friends, in the longing for renewed relationship.

Are you looking for Him too?