My Dad's Legacy, Part 1

Two years ago this Sunday, my dad breathed his last breath on this earth. I realize some of you may tire of hearing me talk about my dad. Really, these posts are more for me than anyone. I have found that there is no better way for me to heal than to write about him and reflect over his life and the impact he had on me.

My dad was always quick to praise those he loved. Have you heard the advice, "For every correction you give a child, praise him 10 times"? My daddy lived that out. I hardly remember him ever speaking a harsh word to me. He told me a thousand times that he was proud of me. His last words to me, other than "I love you," were "ASH, you've been a good daughter." I don't know about the truth behind that, but I do know that he was one incredible dad to me! One of the things he always expressed to me was that he loved my writing. Well, in the year of my dad's illness, I learned something new about him...he was a great writer too! Just 11 days before his heaven-going, my dad wrote these words on his Caringbridge site:

"It is hard not to marvel at the Apostle Paul and his response to hardships. His physical afflictions would be enough to make most of us buckle. Add in the desertions from trusted brothers and sisters in Christ and it would appear to be overwhelming. He never appeared to waver. 1 Thessalonians 3:7 sums up this wonderful perspective he operated from. 'Therefore, brothers, in all our distress and persecution we were encouraged about you because of your faith.' Instead of being drug down by his own trials and almost constant opposition of some kind, he was able to focus on the growing faith of others and that not only diminished his setbacks, but created a great amount of rejoicing for him. Lord Jesus, for those of us living 2,000 years after the Apostle Paul, but still subject to no fewer difficulties, would you give us that perspective that brings joy and contentedness in the thick of our own distresses and persecutions, wherever they may be coming from. Thank you!"

It is amazing to me to read those words, knowing that his prayer even days before his death was for perseverance in Christ. My dad loved Jesus, so much so that he died in peace and at rest with his Savior forever.

Over the next few days, I'm going to share with you some of the things I loved the most about my dad:
1. One of the things I loved most about my dad was that he was devoted to me. I was totally a daddy's girl. The year he suffered from cancer, I quit school and moved back home. Some of my favorite memories from that year are of dates with my dad. I'll never forget the very last date we shared. He was in so much pain, but he did his best to hide it. He wanted so much to be strong for me. We went to an old cemetery and parked there in the parking lot, waiting probably half an hour for him to gain his strength so that we could go for a long bike ride. While we sat there, I just talked...and he listened. As he always did. I talked about my future...knowing it would be without him, and wanting so desperately to get his perspective on it. To this day, I'll never forget some of the wise words he shared with me. He was in pain, but he listened.

My dad used to tell me that, when I was little and would get hurt, he would scoop me up over his shoulder. I would be so upset that I would start pounding on his back, just trying to physically express my pain in some way. He would just let me pound on him. He may have been in pain, but he loved me so well.

Two weeks before my dad died, he put on a suit coat that hung on his frail frame and took my younger sister and I to our church, where he walked us down the aisle so we could have pictures with him to display on our future wedding days. He was hurting, he was dying, but he was still more concerned about my welfare and future than he was about himself.





My daddy was so incredibly devoted to my family and I.

Today, I miss him. I've learned since he went to be with Jesus that I will always miss him...and that's okay. The missing and hurting will only make the Heavenly reunion sweeter.